Confessions of a Transgender.
Updated: May 7, 2018
With many family and friends finding themselves in the conversations of transitions, I can personally speak from experience. My brother is pre-trans. Admittedly it has been really hard for me. I wasn't the big supporting sister I wanted to be; it was strange going from having a sister for 18 years, to then 4 years ago she said she wanted to be a boy. Talk about pie to the face. I was shocked, and confused. What do you mean? You are my little sister. I used to practice cutting and coloring your hair in cosmetology school. I felt like it wasn't real. Within the last 5 years there has been a prevalence of unisex bathrooms, gay and trans news feeds, transgender rights, as well as the legality of what being transgender means. When does the government official dub you what gender you feel inside? Through all of the skepticism and hurrdles, my brother Kenny has stuck to his guns and would like to share what the experience has been like for him. Please show your support by sharing, or commenting below.
Hello everyone, my name is Kenny. I got asked to write about being transgender, and honestly I have no idea where to begin. So thank you to everyone who will take the time to read this. Junior year in high school, 2013, is when I knew that I was transgendered. At the time I didn’t even know what that meant. All I knew was that my body was supposed to look like a guy’s. I always saw guy’s walking around shirtless, having beards, and hearing them have deep voices. I thought, “Wow, that’s what I am supposed to sound and look like.” So I did some research, found out the proper term and I knew that I was transgendered. Figuring that out was the happiest, yet scariest thing to realize about yourself. You grow up in a world where being gay to some people is amazing and to some it is the worst thing to be. It is hard to be a pre Tran’s guy, which means I haven’t started hormones or anything yet. I do use the boy’s restroom but it is tough. A lot of things run through my mind. Are they going to know I am not an actual guy yet? Am I going to get beat up for using the restroom? Although that has never happened, I still get worried. Can you blame me though? Always hearing stories from other Tran’s people, even gay people, that they get beat up or jumped in the bathroom or bars.
It is not easy being Tran’s, especially when you have to tell your family and coworkers. Now let me tell you that was not easy at all. When I told my coworkers they were all happy for me and told me that they supported me. A lot of them told me that if I ever needed someone to talk to or if I needed someone to go with me to a support group they would go with me. That made me the happiest guy in the world to hear that. To have so much support from a group of people. Now when I told my family that did not go so well. Most of my family does not understand and I have a few that do. Growing up in family where being gay was ok but coming out as Tran’s, not so easy. I have a few relatives that call me Kenny and a guy. They have told me that they will go to doctors’ appointments with me, if I ever needed anything they are here for me. Hearing that from some family member’s means the world to me. Knowing that I can be myself around them and be happy, not scared or feeling bad to be me. Then most of my other family member’s do not understand. They don’t know how to act around me or use the proper pronouns. Some make jokes that they think are funny but actually, it hurts my feelings, but how am I supposed to tell them that? How do I stand up to them without having the fear that I am going to lose them? To some people that wouldn’t matter but family is everything to me. I do not want to lose them, but I can’t lose myself in the process of trying to make them understand. I know it is hard for them and I understand that. I just wish some took the time to try to understand and accept it. Even If they don’t, I will never stop being myself. I am happy with who I am and the man I am trying to be. No one will take that away.
In the hair business there are a lot of stereotypes. For instance, if a man does women hair he must be gay, or if I'm a female barber I must be a lesbian. What and who drives this need for categorizing or labeling. Why can't I just be who I am, and you be who you are. Until who you are interferes with me and my life in a negative way, why do I care. Be the change not the problem.
Thank you guys, Kenny will be back with more trans diary, and you guys will be here to comment below. Ta Ta for now!